Monday, March 2, 2015

What the f**k is wrong with you?

I have been asked many times "Hey,  what the f**k is wrong with you?"  So I wanted to write a little something to explain.

  Fibromyalgia - Pain, Pain, more pain  and irregular restless sleep just in case the Pain wasn't enough.
       -  This also accounts for Irritable Bowel Syndrome, brain fog, joint stiffness, TMJ, muscle spasms, extreme nerve pain, numbness and that wonderful pins and needles sensation...

  Orthostatic hypo tension - when I stand up,  often times my blood pressure will drop suddenly, leaving me very dizzy and occasionally unconscious.

  End Stage Renal Disease - I have zero kidney function, zero
(yes I am on dialysis, thank you for asking)
           -  This also causes high blood pressure (with goes nicely with the above mentioned sudden drops) congestive heart failure (if I drink too much fluid) weakness and more fatigue, because I didn't have enough.

   Tinnitus -wonderful high pitched noise in one or both ears...  quite lovely really,  as long as you don't want to hear anything else and do not currently have a headache.

  Tachycardia - my heart rate is usually above 100.  no matter what I am doing,  this combined with sometimes very low blood pressure can be a real treat.

  Asthma - when I get sick,  just for fun,  I also can't breathe

  Plantar Fasciitis - Pain in the feet caused by tight calf muscles...  ow,  just ow.  Every step.  OUCH  I wear burks, I get yelled at a lot for my footwear,  but y'all can bite me.  (yes I do the stretches)

  Arthritis -  more pain,  but not just pain,  swelling and stiffness too

  Unknown Seizure Disorder - if I have a few more Grand Mal seizures, it will be called epilepsy, but right now it is still "unknown seizure disorder"

  Dry skin  -  itches like a son of biscuit

  Hang nail -  those things hurt

  Migraine - yup,  more pain and sometimes nausea, along with a sensitivity to light and sound (have any of you met my daughter?)

  Sarcastic attitude - diagnosed as a teenager,  no cure yet,,, and I think it is hereditary because my kids also seem to suffer this one.

This is the list when I am well...  occasionally I get sick.

So,  next time you see me and want to ask "What the hell ails you?"  I refer you to this list.

Thank you. and WRITE ON!

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